CharlieMC (charliemc) wrote,

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June's Mom, Dorothy -- Thoughts About Age

I'm just remembering a time when June and I were running on about 'not going there' to old age (as usual). June's my senior by ten (plus?) years, but agrees with me about the 'age issue' completely. We don't feel or act old and have no intention of 'becoming' old, either! (grin)

But we were talking about this and June told me that Dorothy (her mom -- who is 89 right now) feels pretty much the same way we do!

Dorothy had told June what a shock it was to feel young inside and then look in her mirror and wonder 'who that old woman was' that was staring back at her! I just loved that...

My sister Marilyn mistressmarilyn was pretty much frozen at 22 for me for ages. She's just one of the most youthful and vibrant people I know. As she approaches 50 (next April), we're planning a huge bday celebration in Las Vegas with a bunch of women -- most of whom are half our age. (smile)

Many of these women work with Marilyn -- and they love her. Well, she's an amazing person to work for. I can relate, because I've worked for her, too -- and she's the best manager I've ever seen, period. But various women and men at PRFA have told Marilyn recently (and over the years) that she's just incredible -- and young and fun!

You can be 'young and fun' at any age. (Even at 89.)

But how do you explain that to someone who is under 30? Or, under 20?

You don't. If they get it, you don't need to explain it. They don't automatically view you as 'old' because of a number. They don't start treating you a certain way because you're old enough to be their mother (or grandmother). Believe me, nobody would ever mistake Marilyn or me in either of those roles! (grin)

But recently we had some issues -- unpleasant, nasty issues -- here online. It was very upsetting. We let ourselves care about it way too much.

And, unfortunately, part of the problem was apparently age-related (going by the LiveJournal of one of the people involved)...

How do you explain?

Well, if someone doesn't 'get it,' there's no way to convince them. Some people have their minds made up -- and that's that.

I've never been down on anybody because they're 'too old' or 'too young.' That's why Marilyn and I don't run lists at Yahoo! groups that are 'closed' or require age statements (which are easy enough to fake, anyway).

I don't believe you suddenly become an adult -- or mature -- at a given age. I've known 16-year-olds that were more mature than I'll ever be! And I've known people in their 70's who were clearly never going to mature...

I've always had friends of all ages. When I was the 'young' one -- and now that I'm (apparently) the 'old' one.

But it can hurt when young people make assumptions about me based on my age. Assumptions that aren't true -- and that never will be.

Why are some people online so unkind? If they could know me even a little, I often think they'd like me. I've had very, very few people I've known face-to-face who haven't liked me in my RL...

Oops! I've got to run! It's pouring and I feel a little physically crappy, but we've got to go shopping and Sue's here!

I'm not down mentally or emotionally, though!

Tags: 2004, ageism, dorothy, june, marilyn, november-2004

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