As I mentioned in my blog entry yesterday, Marilyn was IN PAIN during her procedure. She verbally indicated that she was suffering, but apparently they did nothing to alleviate her pain. Honestly, this shocks me more than I can express. I've never heard of ANYONE having pain during a colonoscopy before this. Anyway, I just did some online research and found MANY, MANY people who had the same terrible experience she did! I feel the documentation about having a colonoscopy -- and that it's PAINLESS -- is a blatant LIE. Knowing what I now know, I'm not sure I'll ever want to have the test again. Nor do I blame Marilyn for saying she'll be reluctant in the future...
And they can't do ANYTHING during the test to change this? Apparently the ONLY option would be to stop the test (I read several times that people had been suffering so bad that they had to quit the test part way through).
Anyway, when I went back to see her after the test, she was quite 'gray' and looked exactly like she'd had a bad experience. I made a point of not saying anything about to her until much, much later on... But it scared me, I must admit!
As for last night, she was in HORRIBLE PAIN all night long. There was no blood, fortunately. We both assumed that the pain was caused by the air they put inside, which gives you gas-like pain. (Or maybe actually causes gas. Not sure which.) Anyway, she couldn't even lie down for most of the night. It was difficult keeping her covered and warm enough. I felt just terrible for her. And there wasn't anything I could do to HELP her. I did rub her back a little, though.
I read out loud to her for hours, trying to distract her from her suffering. Near morning I kept getting blurry vision and reading things wrong -- and dropping off to sleep sitting up. I finally gave up, but fortunately she was asleep by then. So I left her and went to bed. (Recently I've hated leaving her alone at night when she doesn't feel well, so I spend a lot of nights sleeping in my chair near her sofa, so I can be close. Or if not all night, part of the night sleeping there, anyway...)
Needless to say, she wasn't able to go to work today. I had felt in advance that she should take Friday off, but I'm sorry it was because she was so damn miserable!!! I don't know if this pain can be related to how the procedure went, but she honestly seems to have suffered much, much worse than I did (and I had both the upper and lower done on the same day when mine was done -- and today sister Sue told me she thought the upper was a far more painful test to get done).
Anyway, I did get a bunch of sleep before I got up again. Then I arranged with sister Sue to drive me down to the office. I checked with Christine, and my diabetic supplies that I've been arranging all week long did get delivered today. It was so nice of Sue to take me down to get these...
Carol (at the festival office) said to tell Marilyn everybody was thinking about her. And not to worry, as the meetings had been pushed back into next week (including the meeting for naming the official rose for next year).
Sue and I stopped at Freddies on the way home and I got more paper towels (we go through a ton with how often I'm always washing my hands for testing and my contacts and so on). And Sue needed to pick up supplies, too. Plus we wanted to get Marilyn Starbucks, so we did it there.
I did get my WORK done for the office, by the way. This time of year there are things I need to do -- and they are things that no one else CAN do. So I do make an effort to get in and do what needs to be done. (Just sayin'...)
The rest of the day was pretty QUIET. I got back into my jammies and just spent time lying around, for the most part. We watched a lot of TV and played on our iPads. And read.
We both LOVE Friday nights, and watching "Star Trek" for hours (Classic Trek). It's great fun for us!
The book I've been reading out loud is "The Boston Strangler
" by Gerold Frank (the Kindle version). It's been fascinating, so far. (Marilyn read the book years back, but I never have...)
We ate cornbread around dinner time. Then had bacon and tomato sandwiches later on. And finally popcorn as a late treat. I'm so glad Marilyn was able to eat tonight!!! I have no idea if she'll feel up to do ANYTHING this weekend. We'd planned to go to a favorite bazaar tomorrow, but I'm seriously NOT counting on it. In fact, I suspect it would be best if she RESTED the entire weekend.
All these many, many weeks of her being so sick -- and all the testing that's been done, including the colonoscopy -- have taken a toll on Marilyn. I just want her to get as much rest as she can and to start feeling better. I'd be so very glad if she could finally start to be WELL again. I feel that nobody can live the way she's done since June, without being able to freely eat and drink! I've been so afraid she would get dizzy sometime while driving in traffic...
Anyway, I continue to PRAY VERY HARD for her improvement. She makes light of it all, of course. But she certainly did not make light of the pain she felt during that colonoscopy -- a sure sign of just how bad it must have been. Everyone has been very supportive, which is a tremendous help. We're both very, very grateful for our circle of friends (which includes all of you!!!).
Well, I'm sitting here looking at one of my brand new insulin syringes
, feeling -- I have to admit -- rather fearful. It's certainly a change from using the pen (which seems WONDERFUL by comparison, I admit). I plan to start googling for instructions on using these tomorrow online. Thank God for the internet! And I truly mean that. Unlike the pen, there's NO written instructions included with these needles...
I'll manage, of course. Tons and tons of people do it all the time. (sigh) I'm not planning on being a big baby about it. But right now it's daunting, in spite of my best intentions. Hahaha. That takes me back to memories of my Mom! I recall long ago that she said to us she NEVER wanted to be in a position to have to use a needle to inject herself. That was YEARS before she was discovered to be diabetic, and had to do exactly that for the rest of her life. It was a terrible fear for her, but she got over it -- and I will, too. I think I'm actually far LESS fearful than she was. For me, it's not about the pain (whatever), as much as it is about facing something totally new, that seems more complicated than using a pen (which is pre-loaded). I've used needles on others (our cat Harry and on Mom, too), but never on myself. Yet. Part of me is tempted to QUIT the pen NOW, and move directly to the syringes. Partly because this current pen is a totally different insulin than I'll be on once I finish with it. I'll go BACK to the original insulin I was using. And there is a difference between insulins, after all...
Well, I'm blathering now -- sorry about that! You really do NOT need to hear all the crap running around in my head about this. The next thing you know I'll just be used to it, and that will be that. I DO still notice stomach pain about half an hour after injecting the insulin, though. I can't wait for that side effect to stop. Plus I keep having spleen pain again, which really hurts. There's no treatment for the spleen, so I just have to live with it.
And after all, who has a life with no pain? Hahaha. It is what it is, after all.
Well, I need to check on Marilyn and head to bed, I think. Or maybe read to her some more, if she's still awake...
Sleep well, dear friends -- and have good dreams! I hope you are all in the best of health...